Mar 262013

Bullying Prevention Resources from the Kids Book Group that really can make a difference!

Bullying is a modern day, politically correct term for an old fashioned problem. In most cases, it’s simple. Children who are hurting on the inside feel the need to hurt others. Why? Misery really does love company.

There are many psychological terms you can apply to the problem, but often the answer lies in the heart and in the home of the bully.  In other words, the bottom line is parenting. It is you, and it is me.

We live in a culture where parenting often takes a back burner to career, hobbies, addictions and marital problems.  We live in a culture where video games, often full of violence, act as babysitters.

In addition to those major problems, we can only parent with the wisdom we have been given. Learned behaviors handed down from generation to generation can keep us in a cycle of bad parenting. It is time to make a change.

If your child has a tendency to bully others, here is a simple list of issues for you, as the responsible parent, to take a close and personal look at:

1. Unconditional love and encouragement  - Do you discipline your children with as many positives as negatives? Do you focus on their strengths or their weaknesses? Are you 100% positive your child knows you love them?

2. Structure and discipline (teaching) - Does your family structure give a real, visual image of the golden rule? Or is there anger and disrespect between parents? Is there peace, forgiveness and grace in your home or strife? It is “monkey see, monkey do” not “monkey hear, monkey do.”

3. Emotional well being of the child - Think about your words. Do you build the child up or tear them down? Do you give them your blessing with the words you speak?

4. Parental involvement - Are you there for them enough to know what is going on in their minds? Do you give them an open floor to discuss their problems and concerns without judgement and criticism? Is there family play time? Family prayer time? (I am hoping that Dr. Andrews will elaborate on this topic of prayer a bit as her area of expertise is child psychiatry.)

Our goal is to lift you up, not put you down and there is no condemnation for those who can’t answer the above questions satisfactorily, just room for growth.  Most families, unfortunately have much work to do.

From my ministerial point of view, the best place for you to start is with an apology to your children. Let them know parents are people too, with flaws and imperfections, but that you recognize the need and care enough to make a change. They will respect that tremendously, but only if you stick to your commitment to change.

Bullying Prevention Resources:

1. True Love for Me? by Denise Davidson Mistich teaches children in grades pre-k through 3 that every child, everywhere has true love…even when there are problems at home. It emphasizes the concepts of friendship and true love from God.

2. The Idea Tree by Mary Elizabeth Fam teaches children it is ok to be different and to change.

3. Get Patriotic by Mary Fam and Denise Mistich, teaches children to be good citizens, exercise the golden rule and to seek guidance from God.

External Bullying Prevention Resources:

Bullying Prevention Resources : Golden Rule Pledge.

Denise Mistich

Denise is an author as well as spiritual mentor to many people. She writes from her heart to help little ones find their way in life.